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Thursday, December 02, 2010

Synapse

Who can say what causes one day to be all smiles, another to be all weepy, and still another fairly stable?

I can be getting ready for work in the morning, hear a song on the radio, and dance around - making the dog wonder what this human can possibly be thinking.

But then I can hear that same song (in this case it was Steven Curtis Chapman's "It All Belongs to You") and start to weep as I dance. God, in His powerful and yet unobtrusive way, will break through my self-absorption and use someone's words or melody to get my attention.

Is it the happenstance firing of a neuron? Something about the turkey chili and black beans? When I'm tempted to pull all experience apart and look at it logically, I could very well totally miss how God is intervening.

So, synapse or Spirit, this morning God got my attention. It all belongs to You, God! And it still causes me to weep.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Runaway Train

We wanted to go see the movie, Unstoppable, this weekend, but don't think that will happen. Too many other things on the calendar.

Nevertheless, I still feel like I've been on a runaway train. Why do I allow this to happen? All fingers point in my direction.

It's no secret that I'm on Weight Watchers, and am quite pleased with the results and with the fact that I have a maintenance plan. But every once in a while my appetite and desires get the better of me. I binge. I hate that word. It sound disgusting. And I guess it really is.

I have looked for...and eaten...as much chocolate and nuts I can find today. Out of my bonus points for the week (and my week started this morning), I have 7 left. Truth be told, I've probably under counted, and I really don't have ANY left!

Here's the good news: I know basically where I am. In the past, I would have been content to ignorantly eat everything in sight and pretend I was still going to maintain. I DO have a plan. I DO know how much my body needs (and doesn't).

So, after today's runaway train, the dining car is closed for repairs. Only the fuel for each day will be allowed. It's a plan, and I choose to stick with it.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

That's Me All Over...

Is nothing sacred anymore?

I have no one to blame but myself. My name is all over cyberspace, and to some people that would be a good thing. To others, it's just downright scary.

No doubt you've heard of an "ego search" or "ego Google" or some reasonable facsimile. Type your name into a search engine and see what comes up. You may be pleasantly, or unpleasantly, surprised.

Over my lunch hour I determined to do just that...the ego search. And boy was I shocked! Addresses dating back 25 years, my age (correct, I have to admit), and photos! Yipes!

Some people pay good money for this kind of ubiquitous publicity. I think mine is under the heading of "not-so-discerning" sharing on the Internet.

Go ahead and make your day. Search for yourself. And if, by chance, you find yourself, I hope you like what you find.

Thursday, November 04, 2010

Weak in the Knees

Have you ever seen something that made your legs go weak? These seem to fall into certain categories for me, but mostly it is of the physical infirmity kind. I'd never be a good nurse!

Anyway, I was returning from our monthly Highlights meeting this morning, heading for the street and thinking that this would probably be the last day I'd want to wear the shoes with open toes. It's getting a bit chilly, and I could feel the breeze sneaking into my instep.

Just as I was reaching the curb, a woman passed in front of me. She was shuffling along, and if she had been pushing a shopping cart, I can assure you I would have safely assumed she was homeless. Her footwear was flip flops.

I glanced at her feet as she shuffled by and saw that her leathery heels were split wide open. May I remind you that she is wearing flip flops and has no "heel" on her shoes.

As I crossed the street I began to sway and had to shake myself of it lest I collapse on the pavement. The sight did indeed make my knees go weak.

What could I have done? No money in my purse to give her for a new pair of shoes or at least some cream for her feet. My shoes would have been of no help to her. That opportunity is past.

But I can be grateful.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

But what does it mean???

Layers upon layers of meaning can be extracted when reading Scripture, but that's not what I'm talking about.

When I was studying psych and sociology in college, we had a discussion group that invariably turned to dreams and their interpretations. Do they really tell us anything today, or are they just manifestations of the latest meal we ate?

I woke up in rather a strange mood due to my last dream.

For the past several years my jaw has been shifting. Don't know why, and I don't want to acknowledge that it might just be the aging process. Anyway, it has taken my teeth on a journey I really dislike!

So, before I awoke this morning, I dreamed I woke up, went to the mirror and gasped because I only had a sliver of a tooth where my left front tooth should be. It bled and fell out. I held it up to the light, and saw that inside was the image of an early stage pregnancy.

Oh, weird! But I started sobbing and sobbing and ran to tell Mark that I needed to get to a dentist right away to get my teeth replaced. He said I couldn't possibly go because he was sick and needed me there.

And that's when I woke up.

Any takers?

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Chocolate "Cheesecake"!

Just had to share this, courtesy of a mild tweak of Britany's pass-along recipe.

First of all, make the cake mix base...

  • 1 box devil's food cake mix (If you use low or no sugar devil's food cake mix, you can count the cake part as 2 points. I didn't know this when I started, and so made it with regular devil's food cake mix, which makes the cake portion 3 points.)
  • 1 box angel food cake mix

Frankly, I love the symmetry of that combo ...

Combine both mixes completely in a gallon ziploc pouch. Save for making an assortment of individual cakes.

Now, time to create the cheesecake surprise!

  • Place 1/3 cup of the cake mix in a large mug (I like to use a very large cappuccino mug)
  • Cut Weight Watchers reduced fat cream cheese brick into 8 equal portions. Drop one portion (1 ounce) into the cake mix in the cup.
  • Stir in 3 T cold coffee (hot works, too) or water. Stir until dry is incorporated.
  • Microwave on high for about 1 minute 10 seconds (play with your timing according to your own microwave and your desire for goopy or cakey cake.)
  • Allow to cool just slightly before digging in. MMMMM, the flavor of digging into that cream cheese in the middle of the cake is scrumptious.

Don't like cream cheese? Try dropping a single serving of sugar free chocolate pudding into the cake before microwaving. Voila, lava cake!

With sugar free cake mix combo... total is 3 points for the serving.
With regular cake mix combo ... total is 4 points for the serving. Worth it!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Reading at Bedtime

I am admittedly and woefully behind in reporting on Pearl in the Sand. I finished it quite some time ago, in fact.

Well written, well researched, and brought me to tears - but I don't want to say at what point in the story, so as to give too much away.

It was a romance in the best sense of the word. Not sensual, although containing it. But the tending of the heart and soul...that is what was so touching.

Great work and I highly recommend it.

Now I'm on to Influenza Bomb. Quite a departure from a romance!

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Books, books, and more books!

I am not a speed reader. I digest my books.

When I was in school, I learned skimming tricks, and outlining, and all the key idea grabbing techniques. But you can't do that with fiction.

In fiction, if an author is worth their weight in words, every thought needs to count. So skimming is a dangerous practice.

Right now I'm reading through Pearl in the Sand, by Tessa Afshar. It is getting rave reviews, and it is to my benefit to like it (since I *ahem* work for the publisher). I'm not normally a romance reader, so we'll see how this goes.

I have a stack of mostly fiction by my bedside, and as soon as I am finished with one, I stack it near the door...to either send it on to my voracious-reading-relatives or to our church. Someone is about to get a whole bag full! Any takers?


Sunday, September 05, 2010

Yes, it's been a while

With the advent of Facebook's micro-blogging (i.e. saying whatever comes to mind whenever it happens), the true thoughtful extended blogging has taken a back seat.

Truthfully, this post is just a placeholder to point you to FB, and so that Blogger doesn't think I've dropped off the face of the Internet.

See you soon at one or the other.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Testing my HTML

Blogspot is cool for another reason! I can let it do my dirty work for me. I'm in a training class for creating a Facebook page, and we're using BlogSpot to convert our HTML for us. Very cool!

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Life Goes On

It's hardly fair, I say, I say,
It's hardly fair, I say
For life to travel blithely on
As if a normal day.

A life is gone, the widow weeps
I know not what to say.
We know the truth, but maybe she
Knows not the narrow way.

"Whate'er it takes," he used to say.
He often would repeat
That if his wife would closer be,
He'd glad accept defeat.

It's our turn now, it is, I say
For us to meet her need.
What would be worse, in this or next,
His word she wouldn't heed?

Don't turn away, o, grieving one.
Don't turn away, I say.
It's only in Christ's sacrifice
You'll meet again one day.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

I Hate Food!

No, that's a big fat lie.

What I hate is the hold food has over me. Why does something so simple as daily food consume (pun almost intended) my thoughts? Why do I have to think about what I'm going to eat? When I'm going to eat it? How much?

It's because that simple daily food consumption is not so simple. The need has turned into entitlement and on to gluttony.

I get the impression that most sin is the living-outside-the-boundaries of a God-given need. For example... adultery/ fornication/ homosexuality are outside the boundaries of the God-given satisfaction of sex. Greed is the o-o-b result of daily needs being met. And gluttony is the o-o-b result of our daily need for food.

This morning I went to a Weight Watchers meeting with Ingrid. I really like the facilitator. She is upbeat, balanced in her approach, but what rankles me about the meetings is the focus on food...recipes, what people did and didn't eat, how to eat more and get away with it. This is the very problem I'm trying to run away from, folks! The focus on food!

I've been a yo-yo dieter for years, claiming every single time that "this is the last time." But, like an alcoholic, I have to admit that this is going to be a life-long struggle of wanting more than I need, and therefore needing to want less.

I will also admit that this time is different, because there is more at stake than just my weight. I'm moving into the era in life where my peers are on meds of all types for hyper- and hypo-this-and-that. I don't want to go there. It may be in my genes and unavoidable, but I want to avoid it as much as possible.

So, although my focus has to be on food for now (just enough and no more), I have to look beyond the scale and on to fruit...of the Spirit...self-control.

And casting all my cares at the feet of Jesus every morning, waiting in expectation for my daily food.

Which, by the way, I don't really hate. It's a love/hate thing.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Something Old, Something New

As the old adage goes: something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.

Not that I would be superstitious. No, it's tradition! So the morning of January 15, 1977, I dragged my maid of honor (well, matron, I guess) to a Penney's store and found a blue garter that I could throw away. Hey, it qualified for the traditional garter, something new, and the blue. And the garter I wore on my other leg (that I wouldn't dare throw away) had belonged to (borrowed from) my mom. So ... in my estimation at the time ... old.

It was the first year that the Air Force was celebrating the commemoration of Martin Luther King's birthday, so our wedding had to be postponed by two hours. No problem.

My m-o-h had helped me move stuff into our new townhome, and Mark would move his things in after the honeymoon. In the meantime, that townhome became my home base. And that morning was when I remembered that I had forgotten the new blue garter.

Due to circumstances that I will not dive into here, I was on edge that morning and was working just to smile.

At the Air Force chapel, veil in place, I took my father's arm. He walked me down the aisle, gave me away, then stepped up to the platform to co-officiate with another chaplain.

That's when I noticed something. Whether from prompting by others to keep the blood flowing, or from sheer fright, Mark's knees were knocking. What an auspicious beginning: me on edge and Mark's knees knocking.

If God gives us the days, my goal is 79 years like Grandma and Grandpa Nelson!

But here we are, by God's grace, 33 years later. Somewhat older, but somewhat newer. Too much borrowed...and sometimes (but not often) blue.